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A Dogs' New Year Resolution

1. I will not eat other animals' poop.

2. I will not lick my human's face after eating poop.

3. I do not need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm lying under the coffee table.

4. My head does not belong in the refrigerator.

5. I will no longer be beholden to the sound of the can opener.

6. Take time from my busy schedule to stop and smell behinds.

7. Grow opposable thumb; break into pantry; decide for MYSELF how much food is "too" much.

8. The garbage collector is NOT stealing our stuff.

9. I will NOT chase the stick until I see it LEAVE THE IDIOT'S HAND!