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A Dogs' New Year
Resolution
1. I will not eat other animals'
poop.
2. I will not lick my human's face
after eating poop.
3. I do not need to suddenly stand
straight up when I'm lying under the
coffee table.
4. My head does not belong in the
refrigerator.
5. I will no longer be beholden to the
sound of the can opener.
6. Take time from my busy schedule to
stop and smell behinds.
7. Grow opposable thumb; break into
pantry; decide for MYSELF how much
food is "too" much.
8. The garbage collector is NOT
stealing our stuff.
9. I will NOT chase the stick until I
see it LEAVE THE IDIOT'S HAND!
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